Then I had a crisis of confidence, should I send in creative nonfiction or fiction? And WHICH fiction? The novel I just sold? The new novel? Should I send in an essay, but then that means I would have to do a book of creative nonfiction if I won and I don't really want to do that. This, of course, made a trail right into angst about whether or not I should apply for a Guggenheim. (I think I will! Why not! Of course this means approaching writers and asking for recommendations and hoping this request will not be met with a clearing of the throat and a polite step backwards. How much rejection can a girl take? Well, when it's me, A LOT is the answer.)
Of course, I still cannot get into the site, and NEA tells me they are very, very slow. All I have to do is make a final decision on which fiction to send and hope it works.
Sigh, isn't there a patron out there who will just front me the money so I can write my novel for a year and do nothing else? Come on, I'll even sing for you! I'll write you in as a character name! I'll dedicate the book to you! I'll cook pasta and broccoli!